About this work
Examples of tanka revisit wartime childhood, family and changing seasons, accompanied by discussion of allusive composition and advice on writing from lived feeling. This English version is an editorial translation for access; the Japanese text remains available alongside it for comparison.
Parallel reading
日本語と英語で読む
Read the Japanese original and its English translation together. On smaller screens, each language follows in sequence.
日本語原文 Japanese original
濱野成秋
終戦の想い出（これはホームページ冒頭の一首のプロトタイプ）
戦敗れ父母哭き稚児の稲田里いま他人の我勝ちに住み
秋となり
稲束を潜り潜りて田螺とり野井戸近きに母駆けつけて
冬となり
戦ひの過ぎにし朝の貧しけれ市にて交わす息凍りたる
栄養失調にて吾は幼時きわめて虚弱にて
われ七つ九つ十五も黄泉想ひいま八十路にてなほ先暗し
同年齢に他界した父の心知りたく思はれ
父君の遺せしノオト読みたしと書棚さぐれど指空しけり
戦跡後年父他界の年齢に達し三浦半島に住まいして近隣を訪ね
キャベツ畑巡り下りて洞穴の基地入り口に叢葉むら
嫩葉の陽黒文字折りたる吾指に落つる病葉行く末語るや
箱根口嫩葉に集ふ同人の作る歓び尽きぬ語らひ
☆本日の締めとして本歌取りを追加いたします。
本歌（茂吉『白き山』より）
最上川みづ寒けれや岸べなる浅淀にして鮠の子も見ず
本歌取り（成秋）
最上川岸辺に凍る稚魚のかげ追へる吾身の行方しれずも
推薦歌
☆本学会はむやみにカタカナをつかうなどして奇をてらうを歓ばず、常に作者の真心の発露を歓ぶがゆえに、左記の歌を参考とされて作歌されたい。
ぬば玉のふくる夜床に目ざむればをなご狂の歌ふがきこゆ 茂吉
死に近き母に添寝のしんしんと遠田のかはづ天に聞ゆる 茂吉
山路来てなにやらゆかしすみれ草 芭蕉
山路来て独りごというてゐた 山頭火
☆この二句を味読されて後に私の雛型エッセイ「山路来て二題」を読まれて参考にしてください。
助言・作歌について
本万葉集は時代色を大事にします。次に親子の心の結びつき、次に生死に対して真剣に取り組む姿勢を良しとします。そこに季節や自然の移り変わりの情景が描かれていればなおのこと結構に思います。成秋
English translation 英訳
AI-assisted English translation. The Japanese original remains authoritative.
Published on February 26, 2020 (No. 1926)
Seishu Hamano
Memories of the end of the war (this is a prototype of the first poem on the homepage)
After the war, my parents wept, and in the rice fields of my childhood, I now live as a stranger
Autumn comes
Slipping through the rice bundles, I caught a snail near the well, and ran to my mother
Winter comes
After the war, in the morning, the poor were so hungry that even breaths froze in the market
Due to malnutrition, I was extremely weak in my childhood
I was seven, nine, fifteen, thinking of the afterlife, and now at eighty, I still feel the darkness ahead
I wish to know the feelings of my father, who passed away at the same age
I wanted to read the words left behind by my father, so I searched the bookshelf, but my hands remained empty
After the war, when I reached the age my father passed away, I lived on the Miura Peninsula and visited the nearby areas
Walking through cabbage fields, I descended to the entrance of a cave base, where weeds grew thick
At a tea house in Hakone Pass, there was a tea gathering. Though it was spring with young leaves, the green leaves were blackened, and the words folded in them fell onto my fingers, telling of the end
At the tea house in Hakone Pass, the same people gathered, and their joy in making songs ended
☆As a closing piece for today, I will add the hokku.
Source poem (from Mokichi's "White Mountain")
The water of the Mogami River is cold, and the shallow pool by the shore has no sight of young fish
Adaptation (from Seishu Hamano)
Following the shore of the Mogami River, I chase the shadow of a young fish, though I do not know my own fate
Recommended song
☆Since our society does not enjoy using katakana unnecessarily or seeking novelty, but rather values the sincere expression of the author, please refer to the following song and compose your own.
On a night when the moonlight is soft, I wake up in bed, and hear the song of a mad woman
My mother, close to death, sleeps beside me, and I hear her voice in the heavens
Two excellent lines
On the mountain path, I come upon some lovely violets
On the mountain path, I speak to myself alone
☆After tasting these two lines, please read my essay "On the Mountain Path, Two Lines" as a reference.
Advice and composition
This Online Manyoshu collection values the spirit of the era. Next, it values the connection between parent and child, and the serious attitude toward life and death. If the scenes of the changing seasons and nature are also depicted, that would be even better. Seishu Hamano
Original wording, author credits, notes and source materials are preserved there.