About this work
A poem compares an unresolved difficulty with tangled yarn while searching for another direction through daily life. This English version is an editorial translation for access; the Japanese text remains available alongside it for comparison.
Parallel reading
日本語と英語で読む
Read the Japanese original and its English translation together. On smaller screens, each language follows in sequence.
日本語原文 Japanese original
どうやって生きてきたのだろう
たった一つの困難が
いま私の前に壁になっている…
いつまでもこんな所に居ちゃだめだ
それはわかっているつもりだけれど
逃げ道も抜け道も見つからない
この苦しみをどうしようか
もがいても、もがいても
解決など見当たらない
まるでもつれた毛糸玉だ
もっと手放して俯瞰して遠のけて
もつれた毛糸をほどきたくて
でもほどけないから
情けなくて悲しくてみっともない
小さな自分がいる
楽しい時間は、あっという間だというのに
皮肉にも残酷にも、ゆっくりと感じている時間
毛玉がもつれて私の首を締め付ける
苦しい、他に出来る事見つけなくちゃ
目を背けて自分の舵を切りなおす
この苦しみを放置したまま
生きるって一筋縄ではいかない
どんな困難も乗り越えてきたというのに
わたしはもっと強いはずよ
試練の多い私の人生
人生ってままならない
それが人生なんだって
自分に言い聞かせて
じっと見る手帳のページ…
English translation 英訳
AI-assisted English translation. The Japanese original remains authoritative.
How have I been living all this time?
A single difficulty
Has now become a wall before me...
I can't stay here forever.
I know that, but
There's no escape, no way around.
What should I do with this pain?
Struggling, struggling,
There's no sign of resolution.
It's like a tangled ball of yarn.
Let go more, look from above, let it fade away.
Because I want to untangle the ball of yarn,
But it won't untangle.
I feel pitiful, sad, and utterly hopeless.
There's a small version of myself.
At least, time, hurry up!
Happy times are fleeting, yet
Ironically, cruelly, I feel time slowly.
The ball of yarn is tangled, tightening around my neck.
Painful, I have to find something else to do.
Turn away, and realign my own course.
Leaving this pain untouched,
Living is not as simple as one string.
Despite having overcome all sorts of difficulties,
I should be stronger.
A life full of trials.
What Is Life? It can't be controlled.
That's what life is,
And I tell myself that.
Staring intently at the pages of my notebook...
Original wording, author credits, notes and source materials are preserved there.